Selected Writing

MCSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY
List:  Uses For End-of-Year Teacher Gifts From Your Students, June 13, 2018

List:  Seven Words I Would Have Children S-P-E-L-L If I Were Running The National Spelling Bee, June 1, 2017
Open Letter:  An Open Letter To The Afternoon Nap My Child Has Given Up, February 24, 2017

THE BELLADONNA COMEDY
Daily Itinerary:  Joel Osteen's Hairdresser, Creating Christ-like Coif Perfection, August 23, 2017

Quiz:  Cockoo Bee or Mitch McConnell?  Let's see if you "hive" what it takes?, July 18, 2017

THE GIRLFRIEND BY AARP
10 New Year's Resolutions To Help Make Dry January More Tolerable, January 2, 2020

 

FUNNY-ISH DOT COM

10 Reasons I am Breaking Up With My Soy Vanilla Lavender Candle I Picked Up At A Craft Fair, December 12, 2019

THE SECOND CITY NETWORK

The Most Boss Gift Ideas To Give This Administrative Professionals' Day, April 26, 2017

What's Next For The Newly Unemployed Monopoly Pieces?, April 4, 2017

Save Yourself From Chicago's 7-Cent Bag Tax, February 23, 2017

Valentine's Day Gift Ideas For Your Unique Relationship, February 10, 2017
Let’s Welcome El Chapo to the U.S. Brooklyn-Style, June 21, 2016

ROBOT BUTT

Area Woman Discovers All Hot Chicago Cubs Players Are Taken, April 6, 2017

10 Chicago Cubs Curses You Never Knew Existed, October 26, 2016

CHICAGO TRIBUNE REDEYE  
Save Yourself From Chicago's 7-Cent Bag Tax, February 23, 2017
Valentine's Day Gift Ideas For Your Unique Relationship, February 10, 2017

HOW PANTS WORK

Five Potato Chip Options for the Trend-Conscious Foodie, February 12, 2017 

AKASHIC BOOKS

A Letter to the Afternoon Nap My Child Has Given Up, December 2018

POINTS IN CASE

Easy Steps to Getting Your Pre-Baby Body Back Before Leaving The Hospital, March 12. 2019 

ONGOING WORK
 

The Little Voice That Lives In My Head Blog, ChicagoNow (Chicago Tribune)
 

@StaceyZapalac on Medium, Medium

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© 2020 by STACEY ZAPALAC : COMEDY WRITER

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